About Dale

One Woman’s Transformation from Caregiver …
to Coach & Eldercare Advocate

Dale Carter is regarded as a respected voice for caregivers. As founder and owner of Transition Aging Parents, she has created a dynamic business devoted to serving the needs of adult children of aging parents. What started out as a simple desire to share the story of her own journey with her elderly mother has catapulted into a book, speaking tours and coaching services, serving 2,000+ in her online and in-person programs.

Dale’s mission statement guides all of her work with adult children of aging parents, “I provide trusted information and personal insight to inspire adult children to passionately pursue, for their aging parents, the quality of life their parents hunger for.”

“I had no knowledge of geriatric healthcare, living options or community resources…”

In March, 2008, Dale experienced, first-hand, the challenges of helping an aging parent in acute crisis. Living 600 miles away, it was a terrible feeling to get the emergency call from her mother’s friend. When she hung up the phone, she felt lost and alone.

She fell back on the only thing she knew, her professional experience of project management. She realized this was going to be a huge project, but certainly unlike any other project she had ever faced.
Her mother’s friend made it clear that her mother’s health and state of living had deteriorated horribly. And, if her mother survived, she would need to stay for months.
Dale had no knowledge about health care for the elderly, home care or long-term care (which looked like a real possibility, given her mother’s prognosis). Dale decided not to waste time searching the Internet. How would she know if the information was even trustworthy or relevant for her mother?
Perhaps most troubling, she knew she would have to learn to work closely with her only brother, someone who had very different perspectives about almost everything in life!

After making a few critical phone calls to contacts in Maryland (her mother’s doctor, her childhood friend and her mother’s church), she began to build her “web of support.” People were more than willing to help. She reflects that the overwhelming support and generosity is probably what carried her through the long 12 hour drive back to Maryland. Right before she left for Maryland, Dale and her mother received amazing and wonderful news. Her mother had not had a stroke. She had had complications due to a viral infection, heavy doses of medication, poor eating, and dehydration. Her health was indeed fragile, but recovery was possible!

The moment her life changed forever….

Dale writes in her book about the moment she realized her life had changed forever!

After that long 12 hour drive from Indiana to Maryland, she entered her mother’s home, and slowly walked from room to room……there was so much clutter, she did not know where her mother slept. The kitchen was full of crusted pots and pans. The dining room carpet was matted with crushed pills. Paperwork was scattered.
It should have been an overwhelming experience, but she speaks about the moment she sat down on a stair step (the only empty spot to sit!). Her mind cleared and she had one simple but profound thought. “No one should ever have to live like this.”
In that moment, she felt her world shift. She had a sense of peace that she would help her mother find quality of life again. And, she did not know how or why, but she knew that this just wasn’t about her own mother anymore. She sensed she had found her life’s calling.

Mom and me

Days turned into weeks as Dale helped her mother with her health, her home, her finances, her choices. So many lasting lessons for this mother and daughter of 56 years! Slowly, but surely, their “web of support” grew and grew. With the tremendous support of family, friends and community, Dale’s mother traversed several major transitions and today is experiencing renewed health and happiness.

Finding Passion for Eldercare

Dale began writing her blog to share her experiences and lessons learned has she helped her mother through her health crisis
Joining Michiana’s Gerontology Consortium and reaching out to colleagues around the world, Dale began collaborating with other eldercare and healthcare professionals
She gained a breadth of understanding of aging and caregiving issues
Dale launched her business, Transition Aging Parents and her BlogTalkRadio show in May, 2009. On her radio show, she interviews a wide range of author and experts on topics from Alzheimer’s to VA Benefits.

A natural progression in her eldercare advocacy was to write a book to address what she saw as a gap and a big need.

When families face crisis,

They did not know where to even begin
A common reaction would be to jump into solution-mode
Worse yet, so many wait until the first crisis to try to bring the family together or to approach an aging parent to learn of their wishes

So, Dale developed the ADAPT framework for caregivers which became the basis for her acclaimed book, “Transitioning Your Aging Parent: A 5 Step Guide through Crisis & Change.” Senior living communities across the country have sought her out to give presentations on her ADAPT framework to family members of residents as well as professionals in the community.

Helping Other Adult Children Guide Their Aging Parents to Thrive and Find Joy

At a book signing in New York City

It is indeed a challenging time in our lives, but it can also be one of great joy, renewed bonds and reflection of lives well-lived! Dale knows this to be true!

A common occurrence nowadays is for someone to call or write to Dale to share that their parent has recently passed away, and then they thank her for the help they have received through her writing and insight. Dale says, “It is indeed an honor to walk with these people through this very special part of their lives, the journey with their aging parents. Their need is what continues to mold my work and inspires me to do all I can do.”
Dale has added a new service for family and professional caregivers: coaching. Although there are some excellent foundational resources and tools that we can all use, our aging parents and our families are all unique in their needs, wishes and values. Coaching and consulting can help those individuals work through difficult dilemmas and discern appropriate action. Dale has taken her background in teaching and consulting, obtained certification as a coach and now offers one-on-one coaching.
She says this about her clients, “I admire their courage. I feel their pain. I celebrate their joys.” One recent client remarked,“You take me to the 10,000 foot level … thank you for doing that.”

Sharing Her Gifts and Talents with Others

In addition to Dale’s work with the elderly, she lends her time to the non-profit, Bridge of Hope Saint Joseph County. This special organization helps single mothers out of poverty with an 18 month structured program, dedicated case manager, and a church mentoring team for each mother.

Learn more about Dale’s book here

Learn more about engaging Dale for speaking here

Learn more about coaching and consulting with Dale here