About Dale
My name is Dale Carter. I provide insight and information to adult children of aging parents. I am one of those adult children… a long distance caregiver to my elderly mother. My home is in Indiana while my mother lives in her home state of Maryland. In March, 2008, I experienced, first-hand, the challenges of helping an aging parent in acute crisis. Living 600 miles away, it was a terrible feeling to get the emergency call from her friend.
Click to listen to My Story
Click to purchase my book, Transitioning Your Aging Parent: A 5 Step Guide Through Crisis & Change
Click to read an article about my work and a recent interview (by SeniorsForLiving.com) “Transition Aging Parents: Tools of the Trade” and their “Faces That Impress Us”
I began writing my blog to share my experiences and lessons learned as I helped my mother through her health crisis. I helped her through a recovery period, helped her find interim home services, and also helped her select and move to a retirement community. I started from knowing nothing about eldercare, stages of aging or the range of options. I educated myself quickly. While I wanted my mother to have “quality of life”, I was very careful to listen to what she wanted. This was a huge learning experience for me… a major life changing experience. My perspective about aging has changed … for the better! I knew I had to share what I learned with others.
It is indeed a challenging time in our lives, but it can also be one of great joy, renewed bonds and reflection of lives well-lived!
I hope my book, e-course, radio show, blog and ezine articles will provide you with the information and perspective you need to walk on this journey with your aging parent so he/she can “thrive and find joy” in every stage of life.
Note: My past professional work includes: high school/college instructor, IT analyst (in manufacturing, banking and higher education), business intelligence manager, and project manager/consultant. My work, on behalf of the elderly, is by far my most fulfilling work!
In addition to my work with the elderly, I lend my time to the non-profit, Bridge of Hope Saint Joseph County. I hope you will take a few moments to view our video that tells how we help single mothers out of transitional poverty. http://bridgeofhopesjc.com/
You can reach Dale:
By email: dale.carter@transitionagingparents.com On Facebook: www.facebook.com/DaleCCarter On Twitter: www.twitter.com/daccarte On Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/daleccarter
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
Good morning, Dale,
Like you, I lived through several difficult challenges while trying to help my mother, who lived 635 miles away. It’s so hard to even understand the circumstances without regular visits, and the situation can be even more difficult if some family members are concealing or distorting information. I moved my mother to Colorado four years ago, and it’s so much better now. I enjoyed your articles.
Janet, thank you for sharing. I know when I was going through it, I felt so alone. I am glad your mom is near you now. My mom wanted to stay in her community. But, I now go back several times a year. I have to be there. Best wishes to you and your Mom
Hi Dale,
I came upon your web site and was very moved. My 94-year old father was suddenly moved from AZ to MN. He’d been playing 18 holes of golf 3 days a week and walking 2 miles a day. Then, besides hearing loss, his macular degeneration suddenly became serious and he could hardly see — over night. With a previous background in working with seniors, I became his caregiver but had to place him in assisted living. I thought I already knew a lot – but what a new experience. It led me to create an info web site for seniors too. I really enjoy your writing. The best of luck to you. — Mary at elder-one-stop.com
I hope people of my generation are paying attention, because we’ll be caring for the Boomers.
You are a rare breed indeed. I hope the younger generation is listening too. I know because of my experience with my elderly mother and now my research/writing for adult children, my own children (aged 29 and twins aged 27) have become very aware of the issues of aging and the elderly.
I left a 30 year career in IT consulting/management after my experience with my mother and feel compelled to be a resource and also to get people thinking. I’m a proponent of education and communication within the whole family.
Found you on twitter. Haven’t had time to read all your site yet. However, I am going to listen to the new online radio show if at all possible. We are a retired couple thinking about our next move.
Dear Dale,
I am interested in learning what you have learned about helping the elderly maintain, sustain, and build social supports even as they age and become more frail. With the advent of online video conferencing we have the opportunities to visit our aging parents, have them visit us, and visit others as long as they have a laptop computer and access to the internet. I am also interested in applying George Fairweather’s small group/lodge model program to seniors who are frail and without supports. What do you think?
Sincerely, Phil Spottswood
You pose an interesting question. You would think with all the technology at our fingertips, skype, laptops, wi-fi, that it could be embraced and used by the elderly who are homebound.
Just by personal experience with my mother, I realize the challenge. I found excellent senior-designed, user friendly Familink.com portal/email software. I set my mom up on it, walked her through it, wrote step-by-step instructions, and had her do it in front of me. Now that she is 600 miles away back at her retirement community, I can’t even get her to ask for the password for their computer center. I am traveling back tomorrow; and she’s agreed to go to the computer room with me. So, I will try to get her started again. I don’t dare waste the money on a laptop if she won’t even log onto a community computer.
She has an neighbor, Henry, who is computer-savvy so I hope to meet with him and ask if he will be my mom’s mentor.
I think (for most elderly) they will need one-on-one training, coaching and mentoring. This would be a great added service for home health care aides to provide. Please stay in touch and let me know how your research goes.
Our parents our living longer lives. My mother is 90 and lives independently with the assistance of a health care person.
For those in the baby boomer generation who are also ageing, this is a topic we may not longer defer. How do we help ourselves and how do we assist our friends and loved ones.
Raymond Lavine
Gig Harbor, Washington